19th
The floor is made of lava
Some people believe in the concept of a universal subconscious, a shared awareness that we’re all tapping into all the time, whether we know it or not. Some people don’t. I definitely do and it’s because we all play “the floor is made of lava” when we’re five years old.
Everyone plays it but nobody plans to play it. You know what I’m talking about: The Simpsons referenced it, Daniel Tosh references it, and I know damn well you played it yourself. Everyone does. Why? Why do we all have the same stupid thought enter our head at the same time in our life? It would be one thing if it were discussed ahead of time or if there was some sort of “floor is made of lava” community but there isn’t. It’s not as if there’s a “floor is made of lava” club that has meetings after school.
There’s not even a pragmatic aspect to it. You could never pretend it’s a coincidence that everyone started getting horny around the same time in our lives because that’s actually a biological function that acts as a very obvious Darwinian survival mechanism. “The floor is made of lava” is just a completely random, retarded idea that occurs to EVERYONE when they’re five.
When I thought it up, I thought I invented it. I just assumed I was mental. Then I discovered everyone on the planet has this same idea that makes no sense whatsoever. What are the odds of that? It’s not like I grew up in the tropical islands, I lived in goddamn Pennsylvania. I will probably go to my grave never having experienced actual lava yet it occurred to me to play that game.
If someone can give me evidence that my playing of this game or anyone’s playing of this game is anything other than a giant coincidence, I’d love to hear it. Please, prove me wrong. Until then, I think it’s almost conclusive proof that you and I share the same brain.
